Archive for the ‘turtles’ Category

Nom nom noms

People have been adding some great pictures of turtles eating things to the Turtles Eating Things facebook page! Thanks guys, they’re awesome.

Here are a few recent ones…

Turtle rave

This little guy is rocking out with his shell out.

*I have been assured that the toothbrush is not hurting him, it’s just like getting back scratches.

Tiny cuteness

Someone just put this one up on the facebook fan page.

So tiny, so cute!

Kitten riding a turtle

Alright, I’m breaking the rules here.

But I think you’ll agree that it’s okay in this case that the turtle featured is not in the process of eating…

Kitten riding a turtle (via wimp.com)

Mad kitty

My love of turtles eating things and lols just united.

Turtles all the way down.

“A well-known scientist (some say it was Bertrand Russell) once gave a public lecture on astronomy. He described how the earth orbits around the sun and how the sun, in turn, orbits around the center of a vast collection of stars called our galaxy. At the end of the lecture, a little old lady at the back of the room got up and said: “What you have told us is rubbish. The world is really a flat plate supported on the back of a giant tortoise.” The scientist gave a superior smile before replying, “What is the tortoise standing on?” “You’re very clever, young man, very clever”, said the old lady. “But it’s turtles all the way down!””
Stephen Hawking, A Brief History of Time

I know I should come up with some deep story about the where the turtles end, who feeds them, how a dome holds a plate so still, infinite regression, etc.

Wrong.

Here’s a turtle eating a watermelon. nom nom nom.

PLEASE send in some turtles!!

each one, teach one

Turtles have been around for about 220 million years now. In this time they have changed very little and this got me wondering, why??

Prehistoric turtle

Have turtles somehow decided to to ignore evolution? Maybe they are just so happy with their little mobile homes that ‘what would be the point of changing’. Or maybe natural selection screwed up and set off a chain reaction of non-action.

Say the turtle was supposed have a natural enemy that hunted it in the water and on the ground so much that it evolved into a mole-turtle or a turtle-worm. Or say their enemy was supposed to be this evil ground worm with massive teeth, so the turtles would evolve into flying creatures. Whatever the case, I think turtles are missing out on realising their full potential. I think that we really need to do something about this. My suggestion is ‘each one, teach one’.

Turtle knowledge transfer process

How can we help?
The basic idea of each one teach one, is to find a turtle and try to teach it the things that you think could help them evolve. From there we hope that the turtle will teach another turtle and so on. Eventually we should get to a point of highly skilled turtle saturation throughout the world.

Turtle murders entire family..

I know turtle lovers, it has been a while.

What can I say?  I fell into line, wore dark rimmed glasses, trendy jeans and did what The Man told me. I purchased a mixed dozen of Krispy Kreme doughnuts. I played Hoops for 12 days straight and only I earned 604 tickets. I pretended to listen to a friend’s review of Mao’s Last Dancer. I walked past a Crocs store and didn’t mumble a single smug comment to myself. I even passed up the opportunity to turn my dog into a tiny zebra.

But the saddest thing of all? I forgot about the turtles! I think we all did and now it is time to repent.

Please keep sending in your turtles!

turtles@turtleseatingthings.com

Turtle Love – Join the Facebook Fan Page

Show the turtles you care, join the fan page:

www.facebook.com/TurtlesEatingThings

…and please, send in your turtles!

Turtle Eats Pigeon? (You are a sicko)

So you’re looking for the “Turtle Eats Pigeon” clip hey? Hmm. That’s a bit twisted don’t you think.
Maybe you’d rather hear about this:

(**warning to animal lovers**)

Shanghai activists save cats from plates
Animal activists in Shanghai have rescued 300 cats from a dealer who had bought the allegedly stolen pets for sale to restaurants in southern China, state media says.

The activists, acting on a tip from a cat lover, found 22 bamboo cages full of cats in a freight yard, from where they were to be shipped to Guangdong province, the Shanghai Daily reported on Monday.

Most of the animals were returned to their owners but three cats were found dead and some had broken legs, the report said.

“The cats are abused. They throw the cages on to a truck instead of loading them properly. The cats that survive end up in soups at restaurants,” Lai Xiaoyu, an activist involved in Friday night’s rescue told the newspaper.

Restaurants pay about 50 yuan ($A9.06) a cat, according to the report.

Police detained the cat dealer, Yang Baoguo, after he battled dozens of animal lovers who descended on the freight yard to break his cages, the newspaper said.

The dealer was released after a few hours without charge because animal protection laws are nonexistent in China, the report said.

“There is no law in China saying cats cannot be eaten,” police officer Ma Yong was quoted as saying. “Cats are not a protected animal.”

Yang, who has traded cats for a decade, bought the animals from so-called hunters who trapped the cats in residential areas at night, the report said.

Police could not charge him with possessing stolen property because, unlike dogs, a licence is not required for owning a cat in Shanghai, making ownership impossible to prove, the report said.

Eating cat meat is a tradition in many parts of China, especially in southern regions, where some restaurants specialise in preparing the dishes, according to Chinese media reports.

Link

Now, here’s a picture of a turtle being wholesome and eating a salad. Enjoy. He likes you. A lot.